just sitting here.

just got off the phone with Lauren.
so glad to have a best friend.
so glad it's her.
so glad that she knows me so well.
so glad that she just knows somethings wrong over the phone.
she said she could just tell.
this has not been a very good week for me.
i am struggling.
i don't know if its because it is January.
or because it is rainy and foggy.
or because i am a girl.
or because the day ends in "y".

work has been stressful.
coworkers.
patients with left main right and left.
STEMI's.
on call.
three people to a room.
unpredictable and inconsiderate coworkers.

makes me feel discouraged.
sad.
lonely.

it all came out tonight.
on Alan's shoulder.
i haven't cried in a while.
it felt good.

i took a shower.
i'm clean.
my hair is dry.
nails are painted. toes and fingers.

now i am still.
quiet.
listening to my ipod.
praying.
reflecting.

glad it's thursday.
tomorrow's friday.
things must be better.

this to shall pass...